COVID-19 Pandemic | How to help yourself in times of stress & uncertainty
COVID 19 Stress & Anxiety
We are all definitely in very uncharted territory with the COVID-19 pandemic, stay at home orders and social distancing. It’s a lot to take in not to mention the very sudden and huge upheavals of our routines and of course all the financial and job insecurity that comes with all this too.
Let’s all take a moment to PAUSE.
Take a deep breath in.
Now slowly let it out… all of it out.
It’s okay if you find yourself needing to regroup and reset. It’s okay to not have it all together. This is a time of stress and uncertainty. It’s a lot and it’s okay to be struggling with it.
Here are some things you can start to do now to help yourself get through this time.
It’s Time to Take Care of Yourself
During times of stress and uncertainty we often fall back on those not-so-great habits. Maybe it’s staying up too late, binging TV, drinking too much, not eating healthy or at meal times, isolating more, etc. We all have our “go-to’s,” the stuff we know that isn’t the best for us and it helps us feel better in the moment. After that moment though, we’re tired, hungover, cranky, lethargic, and often down on ourselves. And then the negative cycle continues…
Now, more than ever, is time to take care of yourself. You cannot pour from an empty cup. Your family needs you. Your children need you to take care of yourself so that you can take care of them.
One Small Thing
We often set some very lofty goals for ourselves and it’s great to have a vision and a goal in mind. It’s also important to be able to stick with it. Often times when we set too high of goals or expectations for ourselves we aren’t able to keep up with it. We then end up giving it up entirely (which then adds to the negative feelings about ourselves). Starting small and sticking with it can help build up our self-confidence and create positive changes.
What is one small thing you can do for yourself right now? Some examples can be as following:
Go sit outside for a moment and just listen to the sounds around you.
Do a breathing exercise.
Take a shower.
Get dressed and “ready” for the day, even if you aren’t going to see anyone.
Drink a cup of tea or coffee.
Do a guided meditation.
Journal
Go for a walk.
Listen to uplifting or soothing music.
Try an online exercise class.
Drink a full glass of water.
Sit down and eat a meal.
Read a book
Do some art.
Go to bed early.
Create a Routine and Allow for Some Flexibility
Routines are helpful as they create a sense of “normalcy” and help us know what to expect. Try to put some set times for when to go to bed, wake up and have meals. Between these set times you can then set up “blocks” of time of what task you’re going to focus on. Make sure that you have some time for breaks. Research has shown that taking a break every hour can actually increase your productivity.
If you are homeschooling your kids too, creating them a routine alongside yours is also very important. It’s important to not “over-schedule” things, your kids need breaks too and they need to allow for some “down-time” (just like you).
It’s important to allow some flexibility within your routine. Maybe it’s a beautiful morning so instead of diving into work and school you start out with a family walk, or in the afternoon when everyone is starting to feel lethargic and drained, put on some fun music and have a dance party.
Schedule in some Socializing (while Distancing)
It’s very isolating to be at home and not being able to engage with others in a way we normally would. Even if you typically are home a lot whether you work from home or are a stay at home parent, this is still a lot different. You aren’t just able to go out when you feel like it, go shopping, to the park, etc. There is also a big difference from choosing to be home and not socializing and being required to stay home and to keep your distance from others. These are some extreme limits (for the greater good) and we are not wired for this kind of isolation. We are made to have connections.
Socializing now does take more effort on our part as it’s not just going to happen naturally throughout our day. Here are some ways to engage in Social Distancing while maintaining connections:
Create group chats with your family, co-workers, your kids’ friend’s parents, etc.
Set up a time for a Zoom Coffee/Tea break or Happy Hour.
Have a “play date” over Facetime- just set up your computer or phone and have your kid “play” alongside their friend. This is also a great way for your child to stay connected to grandparents and other family members.
Set up a Yoga class with a friend. Pick a yoga session on Youtube and a time to do it and then afterwards call or text and talk about it. If you really want to make it feel like you are doing this together, set up your phone or computer for a Facetime call throughout it.
Remember, we are all in this together. No one has this all figured out. It’s okay to reach out to others for support.
Allow Yourself to Feel ALL the Feelings
This is a very stressful and confusing time. It’s okay to be feeling like you are on a rollercoaster ride of emotions each day. You can feel like you totally have this together and figured out one day and then feel like a completely overwhelmed mess the next day.
It’s also okay if you feel relaxed, grateful, and happy. You can also feel two seemingly opposite feelings at the same time- you can be grateful to have this “extra” time with your children and feel overspent and want time for yourself. You can feel fortunate that you are able to work remotely and have some job security and also hate working remotely and wanting your “regular” life back. You can feel safe in your home and scared of the future. You can feel joy in the little moments and sadness for the loss of your life how it was.
Be Gentle on Yourself
Most importantly is to be gentle on yourself. We are in a state of crisis. We can’t do all the things nor be all the things to everyone. Take each day as it comes and do what you can. Tomorrow is a new day to start again. You are doing the best you can right now and it’s okay however that looks. When you can, do; when you can’t, rest.
Ultimately this will all pass. There will come a day where we can all go back to our “normal” routines. Do what you can to get through this and know that this is not forever.
Disclaimer: This is not a replacement for a therapeutic relationship or mental health services. This is for educational purposes only and should be in used in conjunction in working with a licensed mental health professional. If you are in California and looking for a professional therapist feel free to use the contact me to request an appointment or search Psychology Today for local therapists in your area.